Saturday, January 29, 2005
Conversations with Pears Volume 11


Me: What?

Pear: Dude, you seem I dunno.... Different.


Pear: What's the story morning glory?

Me: No story.

Pear: Come on man. You can talk to me.

Me: Nothing. I am cool.

Pear: So.... Why do you seem sad?

Me: How do pears reproduce?

Pear: By seeds?

Me: Then you would not get it.

Pear: Try me.

Me: Well, it is a girl thing. If there are no girl pears then you probably would not get it.

Pear: Well, there are no girl pears but there is this female orange Tina, she has peaked my interest.

Me: That's good. Can I give you some advice?

Pear: Sure.

Me: Don't do it.

Pear: Ok. Is this about C.?

Me: Yeah. She and I are having issues.

Pear: Like what?

Me: Well, she is thinking about her ex.

Pear: Well stupid, all you have to do is be you.

Me: Huh?

Pear: Hey, turn off all this sad music.


Pear: You two are good. You need to show her the Jess that she fell for.

Me: But her ex has history.

Pear: So do you.

Me: Huh?

Pear: Remember the water incident?

Me: What if I was a rebound?

Pear: Dude, many games are won by the team with the most rebounds.

Me: Maybe.

Pear: Dude. If you don't go get her back, I will for you.

Me: No pear is going to do my fucking bidding for me.

Pear: SO, what's the hold up? Her ex, is a dick. You flirt a lot, but you are true blue.

Me: Damn.

Pear: Go, now.

Me: But.....

Pear: Update me in the morning.

Me: OK.


Me: Hey, 1 question.

Pear: What now?

Me: Well, as a knee jerk reaction I erased her phone number. Do you have it?

Pear: Fuck.... You are a gawd damn case.

Me: Yes.

Pear: The number is xxx-xxxx.

Me: Thanks.

Pear: Don't mention it. Go get her. She is awaiting your call.

Me: How do you know?

Pear: All she did was talk to him, and have lunch with him today. He was in town for work. You have her heart.

Me:I doubt it.

Pear: Just call her. Ah hell, just go over there.

Me: But.....

Pear: what are you still doing here?


Pear: Quit pouting. Go get your girl. I know you were hurt. She loves you. You feel like that too.

Me: Uhh....

Pear: Go now.


All is well.

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