Monday, January 24, 2005
Scenes from a car-wash volume 1
While waiting for the girl in her pajamas in front of me to finish vacuuming her car.
Me: (Rolling down the window as she walks up to me.) Yes Ma'am?
Her: Do you happen to have change for a dollar?
Me: Yes, here you go. (Hand her four quarters and take her dollar)
Her: I am Ashley.
Me: I am Jesse.
Her: Nice to meet you.
Me: The pleasure is all mine. (Hit window up button)
Her: Hey wait.
Me: OK. Yes.....
Her: Your vehicle appears pretty clean yet you are vacuuming it. Why?
Me: Because I can.
Me: It is 1:00 and you are in your pajamas. Why?
Her: Well, uh. I dunno. I guess I was lazy this morning.
Me: Yet you took the time to put on your makeup.
Her: A girl can't leave home without her makeup.
Me: But she can without her jeans?
Her: Do you argue with everyone?
Me: Nope, only the people I like.
Her: Do you like me?
Me: I guess I must.
Her: Well, OK. But, I have a boyfriend.
Me: Christ on a cracker. I was trying to be nice. How could I like you? I gave you change thats it.
Her: But he is an asshole.
Me: So am I. Listen Ashley I need to go. This is getting weird. I have enough problems with the women in my life already, I needn't add some lady I meet at the carwash who wears pajamas at 1:00 in the afternoon.
Her: Well, OK. But I am a good girl.
Me: Yes. I bet you are. Look I have a friend named Eric, he is weird. You two would be great.
Her: Here, let me give you my number.
Me: Not necessary I will look for a woman in Pajamas, and find you.
Her: Are you being sarcastic?
Me: Yes. Probably a little.